(008) Little rituals and using your nice things
For the longest time, dinner parties have been my favourite thing. Having people come together over a meal, particularly one that I’ve cooked, has become my go-to social arrangement.
I have my family to thank for this. Growing up, my Nonna was in a constant state of preparation - the only times I remember her not cooking were when she was telling my sister and I to keep eating. My mum followed, with our house becoming the default after-school hang for me and my friends, largely thanks to the easy access to breads, cold cuts, and dips that seemed to replenish themselves. I also spent countless nights out for dinner with my dad, where we’d sit for hours chatting and playing chess.
Mealtime was always, in one way or another, ritualised.
Now, even for the meals where we’re not entertaining, my wife and I make an effort to set the table and put on some music. On the occasions where we don’t set the table—like last night, where I cooked a bowl of pasta and ate it standing in the kitchen, while we discussed our Substack strategies—there is a noticeable difference in the enjoyment of a meal.
It sounds simple, but the ritual of intentionally preparing your space for a meal is powerful. It pulls you out of the routine of work and chores, and makes you present for the other person and grateful for the morsels in front of you.
This realisation, as profound as it is, led me to another question — why do we only set the table with our ‘nice tableware’ when we’re having people over?
Perhaps there is this sense that special objects, tableware or otherwise, are more delicate, so sparing use is playing the long game. Or perhaps we hoard these objects to signal to others just how good our taste is.
Whatever the reason, I’ve decided we should be using our nicest things even for the most mundane meals.
So, in an effort to re-inspire mealtime, I’ve created a playlist to set the mood and curated some objects worth sitting in front of, with or without food. If we all had more special things to place on our tables, we might spend more time around them.
Enjoy x
Mood
Objets
Left: Bronze flatware by Izabel Lam. Right: 70s Cutlery Set from Boga Avante Shop.
Left: Alpaca Silver Egg Cups also from Boga Avante Shop. Right: Dippy Egg Cup by Achille Castiglioni.
Left: Alessi Pulcina Espresso 3 Cup Coffee Maker. Right: Metal Coffee Cups by someone talented.
Above: This incredible Cake Lift by my friends at Studio Shand
Above: @studiokyss 925 Heptadecagonal Shuki & Shuhaidai / Sake Ware (but pour anything our of this and it will taste better).